Wadda Red Neck!

Went upstairs to take a shower a bit ago and, looking at myself in the mirror, realized just how red Mr. Neck is right now. So I thought I'd share.

As I explained earlier, dead skin has pretty much sluffed off by now and I'm left with the bright, shiny raw skin. As you can imagine, it's pretty sore and it's pretty sensitive.

Beyond this, though, I'm actually having a pretty good day. Overall energy level is up, the antibiotics seem to have done their job attacking at least the sore throat part of the infection, no fever, etc., etc.

This is all relative, of course. My mouth is still sore, still not doing cartwheels or anything, but I have to find good things where I can.

Caitlin's coming home tonight so we'll have the whole crew in for the weekend. Hopefully this relatively good feeling thing will continue through the weekend.

Headin' For the Weekend

Haven't posted anything for a while. I didn't realize it had been so long.

It's been a middle of the road week so far. I didn't bounce back very quickly from last week's treatment. The chemo drugs left me feeling puny through Tuesday, about the time the Radiation Reaction peaked for the week. Then, to top things off, I've picked up some kind of infection.

So Monday and Tuesday were spent feeling quasi-nauseous and tired. My mouth was getting progressively more and more sore because of the returned Thrush and the Radiation sores. I've now not eaten anything but Jello since Sunday, with everything else going in via feeding tube. The feeding tube thing isn't as big a deal as expected but I'm still not exactly comfortable with it. The good news is that my insurance will cover my Nutritional Supplements for the feeding tube so that's a help.

Skin-wise I've been red and peeling up to my eyes on my face and all the way around my neck. My neck is one solid chunk of raw skin as the dead skin peels away. Kinda like one of the worst sunburns you've ever had. That extends down to my upper chest. So it's a larger area than we were expecting. I called to try to ask some questions but the Doctor wasn't easily available and the nurses were full of generic responses. We considered just going in to see the Radiation Doctor on Thursday but decided to wait until our regularly scheduled appointment with them on Monday.

My facial hair is kinda bitin' it. Not completely a bad thing, but I had to trim off my beard yesterday. I still have my mustache for the time being but we'll see if he survives. I've not had to shave in over two weeks, though. Unfortunately I'm also losing a little hair at the neck-line on the back of my head. This is all due to Radiation, not Chemo, so it's very specific areas.

By Tuesday night my throat was way sore as well and, by Wednesday night, I was running a low fever. We had an Oncology Doctor Appointment on Thursday -- our weekly check in. She said I have an infection that's causing the sore throat and fever and I likely have a skin infection which is contributing to the larger area of redness/peeling. She chalked some of the sores on my lips and inside my nose (getting nosebleeds pretty regularly) to a fungus. So, she gave us three more prescriptions. Antibiotic to fight the infections, Antifungal to fight the fungus and some liquid Morphine so that I'll still be able to take pain medication if I get to the point I can't swallow pills.

Another wierd thing is happening. My fingers -- almost just my finger tips -- have become exceedingly sore. This is something they told me could happen to my hands and/or feet. So far it's just hands but a couple of times I was unable to button a shirt and needed help this week. They're better now but I also have a fair chunk of pain killers in my system to deal with my throat and other stuff. So, we'll see how that progresses.

Being a Structural Engineer and all, I've decided to analyze our cabinets to make sure they are structurally adequate to support the continued onslaught of prescription medications that are piling up on them.

Blah Weekend

Got my pump off Saturday morning. Don't feel terrible but haven't really rebounded like I did the first cycle. I still feel pretty bad. Not nauseous, really, but not right. Hard to explain.

I've been amazed at the fatigue. I know, I'm not that far into this and it's gonna get worse, but it's a tired like no other tired I've experienced. It's not like you can take a nap and feel refreshed. There's no such thing. You're just always tired.

Jenny got to go to St. Louis Saturday for a friend's son's wedding. I think she had a lot of fun and Lord knows she could use the break.

Sleep came for only a few hours Saturday night. Not sure what the deal was. I got to watch Die Hard, though.

Mizzou kicked butt this weekend. Too little too late, I'm sure, but still better than not having a good weekend. The Chiefs even thought about winning today. I thought they were going to. But, they're just not that good yet and they found a way to lose it. I assume most of you are reading to get some good insight on Football games, right?

Crappy Day II

Same song, second -- or some other -- verse today. Nauseous, tired and also Nauseous. I did manage to eat some Jello this afternoon and some Oatmeal this evening. That's all I've had since lunch on Thursday. I'll not get into details of my Nausea. Suffice it to say, it's not been fun.

But, another week of treatments down. I go Saturday morning to get my frickin' pump disconnected. Not coincidentally, I think, the chemo drug that's in my pump is called "5FU". Don't mean to offend, but the "FU" part is particularly appropriate. It just kicks my butt.

So, to put a positive spin on things, we're 40% of the way through treatment. Just need to drag through three more weeks of treatment then I'm on the other side. A friend from treatment who's on the same plan I am but is 6-weeks further along, just finished up treatment today. He goes to get his frickin' pump disconnected tomorrow then he's completely done. That gives me something to look forward to. Congratulations Ron and Mel!!

Crappy Day Today

Worst day of the whole treatment so far today. Ugh!

Started feeling nauseous on our way to treatment this morning and that just set the tone for the day. I've felt nauseous all day today and slept most of the day between treatments. This in spite of the fact that my good friend Keith was over doing work on our basement most of the day. He did get a few jabs in because I slept through a fair amount of noise on his part then woke up when my cell phone rang. I guess I'm conditioned.

But the nauseousness is almost overwhelming. I really feel like I need to puke and I'd feel better, though I'm not sure I really would. But I'm not puking, just feeling like it's imminent. This afternoon and evening my neck has really started hurting. I guess the radiation treatments are finally catching up with me. It burns. It's sensitive to the touch. My shirt rubbing on it makes me crazy.

I just want to be done! And I'm on day four of cycle two. I've got a long way to go. Better buck up!

Long Day

Dang, it's amazing how long a quick, 7:30 radiation treatment and a 9:00 "how's it going" doctor appointment can take.

Not sure how but radiation was running behind -- at 7:30 in the morning -- and we didn't get out of there until 8:15 or 8:20. So instead of First Watch, we had McDonald's for breakfast so we could get to my 9:00 Doctor Appointment on time. Needn't bother. That went exceedingly slow as well.

But, we did finally get to see the doctor, get a few questions answered and, according to the MRI results from yesterday, the tumor is shrinking so that was good news. Lymph nodes haven't changed much but they weren't expected to. While there they suggested I get a Flu Shot and a Pneumonia Shot so I did -- right then and there. Well, sorta right then. That added an extra 45-minutes to our stay.

But, I'm now vaccinated and have a nice sore shoulder for my effort. From the shot, though, not from everything else.

The MRI also showed that there are no structural problems with my neck/nerve thing. They've concluded my left shoulder problem is Shingles. Looking closely at my neck he found what he thought were signs of Shingles that we had probably mistaken for Radiation effects. In any case, he thinks the Shingles are bugging the group of nerves under my left collar bone and that's the source of my problems. So, I guess we have a culprit and it seems under control with the pain medication, we just need to get them fully placed under thumb.

For the first time the skin on my neck is really starting to feel and look funny. It feels "thick" or leathery to me all the sudden. I guess I knew it was coming.

Tired, tired, tired tonight. Hopefully that will translate to a good night's sleep tonight.

Knock on Wood

So far so good with this round of treatment. Yeah, we're only 2-days into it, but by this point last round I was into the Heartburn and starting to feel nauseous. Hopefully proactive pill-taking has prevented or minimized those this time around.

Got a prescription Monday for full-fledged sleeping pills. Worked very well Monday night. Slept through the night!! And in my own bed!! Jenny and I couldn't remember my doing that since my surgery Aug 29th. Tuesday night's gone pretty well. I slept until now -- about 5:00 am. Not perfect but way better than things were going before.

All these drugs, though. And I'll get to take more as time goes on. Kinda worrisome.

Jenny's going with me to appointments this morning. I have an early -- 7:30 -- radiation treatment then an appointment with the Oncologist. Just a check-in to see how things are going type appointment. We do have some time to kill between appointments so we're going to hit First Watch and I'll see if I can't get down some good breakfast food. Probably Eggs and Pancakes is all, but it's real food.

Folks continue to be great by bringing over food. Thanks so much. Some things have worked out for my to eat some but the family's been chowin' down and it's been great. Thanks again.

Day 1, Round 2 Down

Combo day today with Chemo and Radiation treatments. Morning confusion as there was the first time around. Where to be when, what treatments are we doing in what order. Not sure why they can't sort that out before we arrive. But we made it through. So now I have my handy fanny-pack I get to wear all week with the 5FU drug getting pumped in slowly over the week.

Also saw the Radiation Doctor after my morning treatment. I had lost 4 pounds since last Monday. The Nurse got on to me, the Resident got on to me and the Doctor got on to me. I felt like I was in a prenatal visit. They told me that even though it FEELS like I'm eating a lot, my mouth pain makes me think I'm eating more than I am so I'm supposed to start supplimenting with 2 or 3 Boost/Ensure type shakes per day. Don't need to use my feeding tube or anything as long as I can drink the supplements, but they want me downing more calories.

He was also a LITTLE concerned about the amount of mouth sores I had at this stage. He said any mouth sores this early SHOULD be caused by the 5FU drug more than the radiation but, as a precaution, he put some sensors on my lips during my afternoon treatment to make sure there wasn't something awry there.

Tuesday morning is my MRI on my neck to see what's going on with my left neck/arm thing. This is to check for any structural stuff -- slipped disc, bulging disc, etc. -- then we'll go from there. The drugs have done a good job of keeping it under control. It's still there, numb in the same places, hurting in the same place, the hurting just isn't as intense. So hopefully we'll get some kind of positive result from that. Dr. Appt to review the results isn't until Friday, though.

Talked for a while to a Guy and his wife that I've been following along all the first week of treatment. He's on the same treatment schedule I've been on but he's starting his LAST week of treatment today. I hope I'm in as good of shape as he is come December 1st. Of course, they told us a story of another man who's starting his second cycle just like I am and he already has tons worse stuff than I have. So who knows. We'll just have to wait and see and do our best with whatever gets thrown our way.

I ate two eggs over-easy and two pancakes this morning. The eggs went down easily. The pancakes were slathered in butter then drenched in syrup. That softened them up enough to make them go down without to big a fight. I really hated having all that butter on there, though. :)

Ignoring Football, a Pretty Good Weekend

OK, we'll get this right out of the way up front. Blue Springs H.S. -- ranked #1 in the state and #43 in the nation, got their butts kicked by Blue Springs South. Mizzou got their butts kicked by Texas -- no comments from any of you current Texas residents who moved there from Missouri -- and the Chiefs are in process getting their butts kicked. So, we're 0-3 in games of interest here at the Robinson household.

Fortunately we're not sports fans.

Separate from the Gridiron, though, I've had a relatively good weekend all things considered. I've pretty much given up on eating things that require chewing. But Jen and Pat have been exercising the blender quite a little bit -- blending up my soups before I eat and dreaming up variations of smoothies and shakes. I did have some grapes -- unblended -- with my lunch today. Kinda-sorta chewing and it worked OK. But bottom line, my mouth is still pretty sore and pretty gross looking.

My right shoulder (Surgery Shoulder) is making daily progress. Still a month or so away -- if this continues -- from anything approaching normal but it's making progress.

And, my left arm/neck problem is still hanging around but hasn't had any more of severe flare-ups like I did late last week. The numbness is still there, a deep ache is always there but manageable, and I get occasional short term flare-ups, but just for a few seconds, not hours. Not sure if it's the Lyrica, some other drug or if it's just getting better.

Sleeping's still been on-again/off-again. Thursday night was good, Friday night was only about 3 hours long, then last night I got in bits and pieces that added up to seven or eight hours but there were several interruptions. I'm always tired. And I don't know if that's because of the cancer, the drugs, the lack of sleep or all of the above.

But all in all, not feeling terrible and we're gearing up for my next week of treatment. I started tacking the Heartburn medication yesterday and I'm starting the anti-nausea medicine today. And Jenny bought me a second Sunday-thru-Saturday pill dispensor so I can have one for morning and one for evening.

Damn I'm cool!!

The dogs are all getting along well now. Petrie and Trampus (Pat's dog) wrestle incessantly and Woody referees and, otherwise, ignores them.

Back to the routine tomorrow. Chemo, Radiation, etc., etc. Pat's got her driving gloves on.

AAAAHHHHHHhhhhhhh

I thought last night was going to go like the previous few nights with my arm making a bid for my gnawing it off because of the pain. That pain kept showing up in bits and pieces but never fully manifested itself. I guess the drugs did their job.

But, come 11:00 or so I got into the recliner, found a position where my arm didn't hurt and I didn't move. Jen threw a blanket over me and brought me a glass of water and that's where I stayed -- until 4:00. 5-hours of uninterrupted sleep! Unheard of. Then, as a kicker, at 4:00 a got up, took a bathroom break, threw down one more pain pill then . . . went BACK to sleep.

What a night!

Cancer? What Cancer?

I'm finding this hard to believe. I'm 6-weeks removed from pretty significant shoulder surgery. I've been diagnosed with Cancer and I'm off and running with treatment to get that cleaned up. And neither of those are my most pressing issue de jour.

My arm/neck/nerve thing on my left side is just about out of control. Yes, it comes and goes. When it's "Gone" my arm is achy and weak and my neck is numb but sensitive to the touch. That's when it's gone. When it comes my upper arm is uncontrollably painful. Nothing I can do to appease it, it just hurts like hell. Poor Emily and Jenny have been exposed to some language I'm sure they had never heard before. Hopefully Sophie can't hear.

But seriously, I'm not sure what to do. I have an MRI scheduled for next Tuesday to look at my neck and spine to see if something's awry there. I had an appointment this morning with the Nurse Practitioner at my Oncologist office for bloodwork, weigh-in and general "How are things going" visit. She said we'd be needing some advanced pain meds soon enough any way so why not go ahead and get started to see if they help with this neck/arm thing. So, I have a "pain patch" I get to start wearing that doses me regularly then I have some other good stuff to help with the peaks.

I'm a little hesitant to be taking all these drugs -- especially so early -- but she told me not to worry about it. It's just part of the course.

Now on to the miniscule subject of my cancer treatment, I have sores and blisters on top of sores and blisters in my mouth. Absolutely disgusting -- not to mention painful. The N.P. told me I've already managed to develop a case the Thrush -- a yeast infection -- in my mouth. So I got more drugs to deal with that.

When this all started I bought one of those pill dispenser things that "old people" have to put all their medicine in. You know, it has seven little compartments with "S", "M", "T", "W", etc. on top of each compartment. What the heck!?! I have too many pills to fit into the stupid compartments! I'm going to have to get a second one so that I can have one for my morning pills and one for my evening pills.

Body wise I feel pretty good this week. My mouth and throat are killing me, my right arm/shoulder are making progress but still well below normal and my left arm -- well, you already heard more than you wanted about that. But other than those non-insignificant items, I generally feel well. Still tired, of course, given my ongoing insomnia, but no nausea, no heartburn, no other general aches and pains. I'm extracting that as a positive for the week.

I have a full-time Chauffer now in Jenny's mom. Between the lack of sleep and the pain drugs I'm not interested in another "nap at the stoplight" incident. So I think my driving days are over for a while. Tim will be devastated as that means he now has a car to drive.

And many thanks to the folks from Jenny's work and from the Soccer team. We've been getting some great meals and they just keep coming. Thank you all. That's one less thing we (Jenny and her mom) have to worry about plus the food's been marvelous. I'll have to admit, we're getting pretty close to the point I'll not be enjoying them personally but the rest of the crew still has to eat and it's been great. So thanks for that as well as all the thoughts, prayers and cards that have come our way. We can feel your support and we appreciate it.

OMG - A Mouth Transplant, Please?

Geez, I know I'm just a week and a half into this and I know I have even more fun to look forward to, but my mouth is KILLING me already. What's this going to be like in a couple more weeks? I try not to think about that.

Muscled down some steak soup and french bread for dinner tonight. It was darn good but it was a challenge. Just take your time, dip your bread in the soup to get it soggy, and grit your teeth when you chew or swallow. Jello ain't exactly a nutritional giant but is much easier to eat. We're getting to be friends.

Went a new doc today to talk about my LEFT shoulder that's been giving me trouble. And having said that, it's not really my shoulder as much as it is my neck and my left upper arm. Comes and goes but when it's there, it's excruciating. Yeah, I know, I'm sounding pretty wimp-like, but I can't understand why this is all coming together now. The Doctor had a couple of theories on what's going on. Took and X-Ray that was non-conclusive. They're going to schedule an MRI that will rule out any structural things then we'll go from there. I think I'm going to know all the folks at Diagnostic Imaging on a first-name basis here pretty soon.

Sleep was lacking again Monday night. Got in about three hours. Did get to watch a good, old Christopher Walken movie on IFC. I like C.W. Kinda wierd but in the right role, he's good. So much for the wedge pillow and new drugs as miracle cures. I fell asleep in my car at a stoplight this morning on the way to work. Even managed a quick dream before someone honked. Couldn't believe it! I've never done that before and it scared me. I'm going to have to be careful about driving.

Sunday and Monday went reasonably well. I'm very tired all the time. Partially because of my continued poor sleep and partially because I have cancer and I'm taking a zillion drugs that make you tired.

I did receive my mail-order prescription, finally, for some anti-anxiety medicine that also function as a sleeping pill if you take two at night. I did just that Sunday night and also used a "Wedge Pillow" for the first time. Something went right because I slept through the night.

My mouth and throat are getting progressively more sore since treatment stopped. I guess the Radiation continues working it's wonders for several days after your last treatment. Eating is getting very difficult already. I did stop at a waffle house on the way to work Monday morning and threw caution to the wind. It just sounded too good. I had their all star breakfast -- two eggs, hash browns, Sausage, toast and a waffle. I took me, literally, an hour to eat and it hurt like heck, but it was worth it. Pat (Jen's mom) made meatloaf with roasted Potatoes and Carrots for dinner. Same song, second verse, it hurt like the dickins but I kept after it with my mini-bites, lots of gravy and lots of chewing per bite. Again, it took a long time and it hurt, but it was worth it.

Monday night's sleep wasn't quite the miracle that Sunday night's was. The left Shoulder flared up again. Completely numb from my neck to my elbow and deep pain in the deltoid. Working on four days now so I guess I'll call the doctor about it. Woke up about 1:30, though, and have never REALLY gone back to sleep. Got in a few snoozes here and there but never any deep sleep. Tuesday should be a good day at the office.

Overall summary, then. General body feels great. I'm tired, tired, tired, my mouth and throat hurt like H$%#, and this pesky left shoulder is still a problem. But I'll take all that to not feel nauseous or that heartburn again. Not sure I'll have that choice here before too long but, for now. . . .

One Week Down

Friday went down hill in a hurry after my late afternoon post. Headed down for my 5:00 treatment and started feeling worse and worse as the trip went on. By the time I got home I had no interest in Dinner and instead crashed.

After a couple of hours I woke up and ate a little soup. Tasted pretty good on the way down. Not so good on the way back up a couple of hours later.

Just to complicate matters, at some point in my napping Friday evening I did something to my LEFT shoulder. I woke up and, obviously, slept on something wrong. But it's hurting like "H" "E" Double Toothpicks and it's numb from the left side of my neck down to my elbow. Why does this have to happen now?

Saturday's been a better day, though. I got my pump removed this morning so that officially wrapped up the first week. The shoulder's still buggin' me but not quite as bad. And other than the shoulder, my stomach and other stuff are feeling much better. Actually made it out on the town a bit this afternoon, ate a real lunch and a real dinner, and stayed up for the whole Mizzou game. Although this would have been a good game to have slept through as it turns out.

Now we'll see how the week off goes. Hopefully since nothing else has gone as I was told it would, my week off won't either and I'll do fine.

First week ALMOST done

Friday's been much better up until the last couple of hours. Pretty consistent feedback from everyone around -- "You look/sound so much better today". Just started getting the heartburn and a bit of nausea again this afternoon. Not sure what's up with that.

We're supposed to be going to dinner tonight with Jen's family. Not sure if that's going to happen for me or not. We'll see how the next hour or two go. They're going to Carrabba's, which I love, but I'd not be able to eat my normal fair -- Fried Calamari and some chicken dish that's loaded with cheese -- so I may be better off just skipping. Thought they do have pretty dang darn good bread and I should be able to get some of that down OK.

Gotta go for my 5:00 radiation treatment here in a few minutes, take a pill tonight then go tomorrow morning to get this D*%# pump removed. Then I'll officially have my first of five treatment weeks done. Talking to a couple of guys who are doing the same treatment I'm doing but are a few cycles further along, the week off is actually worse than the week on. So, who knows what to expect for next week. I've quit trying to anticipate and I'll just take it as it comes.

Not a Great Start

Haven't posted much this week. Mostly because I've been feelin' pretty blucky. This first 2-week cycle was SUPPOSED to be uneventful. Not so.

Made it through Monday feeling absolutely AOK. Tuesday started bringing on some Heartburn. Something I've never dealt with before so I now feel bad I've not been more empathetic with Jen because it's a regular problem for her. Wednesday the heartburn was even worse and I started feeling a little nauseous, tired and headachey and I'm tired, tired, tired.

The doctors called me in a prescription for the hearburn, I went ahead and started taking my anti-nauseau medicine and slept, basically, from 6:00 pm Wednesday until 6:00 this morning. Woke up a few times but actually managed to get back to sleep eventually.

Today's going a LITTLE better. Heartburn has settled down a bit, though I'm limiting myself to Peanut Butter Toast and Carnation Instant Breakfast so far. Still WAY tired. I didn't try to go to work between treatments today so I'm doing some work from home.

I'm pretty disappointed. Like I said, this first round was supposed to be pretty easy without much in the way of side effects. Everyone's different, though, and it looks like I'm just lucky. Hopefully this is just some early stuff and isn't an indicator of things to come.

Jen's mom arrived last night to help us out over the next few months. The dogs are an interesting delimna so far but they'll get used to each other soon enough and, I'm sure, become fast friends.

1 Down, 24 to Go

Five weeks of treatment (every other week for nine weeks) with five days of treatment per cycle. That's 25 total days of treatment and I've got one of them down. And, only five of the treatment days are combo Radiation/Chemo days and I've got one of those five out of the way. So dang, this treatment thing is just flying along!

The day was a bit confusing because of some mix-ups of where we were supposed to be when between the Radiation Folks and the Chemo folks. Once we worked through that here's how the day went. Show up at 8:00 at the cancer center to have them install my pump that I'll wear all week and, slowly over the week, it will dispense a Capri-Sun-sized packet of drugs. From there I went a mile down the road to KU Med Center for my first radiation treatment. While I'm there on Monday mornings I meet with Dr. Wang (Radiation Guy) to check in and see how things are going. A mile back down the road to the Cancer Center for and I.V. drip Chemo Treatment. That takes an hour and a half or two hours. Then I have a few hours to kill. Not enough time to go to work or, later, home so I'm searching out local haunts where I might be able to hang out, get internet access to do some work. Found a good coffee shop on the Plaza. We'll see how long that works. Then, late afternoon I go back for my second Radiation treatment of the day and it's off to home.

The rest of the week I'll take my chemo drugs at home, wear my fanny pack with the pump and go to a morning and afternoon Radiation treatment. Should have 7 or so hours between treatments to go to work as long as I can or go home later when I'm not up to going to work.

So that's the routine. I forgot the Camera today but did get a picture of me bolted down to the table with my mask using my camera on my cell phone. Not a great picture but it gives you an idea. If I remember I'll bring the camera and get a better picture tomorrow and replace the picture I'm posting tonight.

And how do I feel? Absolutely fine so far. During the treatments today they gave me some formulation of Benadryl that they told me would put me to sleep. Didn't quite do that right away but made me pretty drowsy. Jenny and I hung out in the Visitors' Lounge for a while after the treatment and I did wind up snoozing for 45 minutes or so. But with a nap under my belt, I felt fine. They keep telling me this will come on gradually over the first 2-3 weeks so we'll see. So far so good.

Aaaaannnnnnd, They're Off!

Well, started out taking my first Chemo Pill tonight so, it's officially started. Had to post my first picture to mark the occasion. Tomorrow morning we're on for more chemo and a couple of radiation treatments. Should have time to kill during and after the IV chemo where I can get in some work from the Hospital. We'll see if that's going to be worth the effort to be productive. Hope to get in to my afternoon Radiation treatment early so I can get out in time to get to Tim's soccer game.

Not sure what I'm getting into but, here goes!

M-I-Z, Z-O-U

Nothing real to report other than Mr. Sleep and I aren't getting along again. But I did want to make sure everyone knew that Mizzou kicked some Cornhusker tail last night.

I'm not really sure how to play this whole Mizzou thing with the folks at KU Med Ctr. There are an awful lot of those little Jayhawk characters on the walls, on business cards, on letterhead, everywhere I look down there. I mean, I know they're saving my life and all, but what's the etiquette here?

OK, I'm starting my last day of "normal". Word on the street is that after treatment it takes 6 months to a year to get back to "normal" but that once you get there it's a different normal. Your body never REALLY feels the way it did before the process began plus you have those lingering side affects. Certainly I'll take the side affects and the different "normal" as a trade off for successful treatment, but this whole thing is wearing on me. So much unknown.

Yikes! Got a little philosophical on you for a minute. Sorry.

But the routine starts tonight. One chemo drug I have here at home in pill form then Monday it's off for two other chemo drugs and two radiation treatments.

I am ready to start killing these little suckers. I've been crazy with waiting and mentally counting the Gazillions of Cancer Cells that have been reproducing while we've been diagnosing and testing and preparing for treatment. But I'll tell ya, now that the time is here . . . kinda scared.

Back Home and Ready to Go

After my upbeat post Thursday afternoon from KU Med Center, things went downhill in a hurry. Unsure if it was a reaction to the medicines they were giving me or if I just got a case of the flu or something, but most of Thursday night was spent puking or feeling like I was going to puke. And, as you can imagine, puking and stomach surgery are a great combination. Early Friday morning they gave me some pretty strong anti-nausea medicine which helped with the puking but really zapped me stupid.

While at the Hospital (and zapped stupid) they took me over to Radiation for a dry run Radiation Treatment before Monday. Making sure the mask fit correctly and everything was in place for the start of the real treatment. That mask is dang-darn tight. 10-15 minutes of having your head/face clamped down to the table. Just ain't real comfortable. I'll try to get a picture to include in Monday night's post.

So, we're now home, I think whatever was causing my problems is gone now, I feel relatively OK and I've been up and about today. My stomach muscles are a little sore but not terrible.

Mizzou game tonight at 8:00. Looking forward to that.

Tubes, Tubes, Tubes

Broadcasting to you LIVE from beautiful downtown (sorta) Kansas City, KS. We're here at the beautiful University of Kansas Medical Center and we're ready for some excitement.

Well, we are at KU Med Center, anyway. They have internet access available in the rooms so I thought I'd take advantage.

Had my surgery today to install my PEG Tube and my Port. For those who don't recognize the term PEG Tube you probably know it by it's non-abbreviated name; Percutaneous Endoscopic Gastrostomy tube. :)

Jenny spent the day with down here and, I think, read an entire book. Close to it any way. Lot's of sitting and waiting. The Port -- at this point -- is no biggie whatsoever. Hardly know it's there. The PEG Tube is a little sore. You mess with stomach muscles and it just hurts. But not bad.

I get to spend the night tonight so that they can test the PEG to make sure everything's installed correctly. Should be going home mid-afternoon tomorrow.

GAWD I'm hungry and thirsty. I'm not quite half-way through my "no food or water" period from this morning to tomorrow morning after the tests. Gonna have to gorge this weekend if I want to be thinking about that 10 lbs.

Time's Closing in

It's been a few days since I've posted anything -- mostly because until yesterday afternoon there wasn't really anything medical to report.

But Tuesday I went in to visit with the Oncologist and finalize treatment plans. So, we're as official as we can be at this point. I'll start treatment on Monday, Oct 6. The treatment will be five 2-week cycles. Each 2-week cycle will begin with my taking some chemo drugs at home on Sunday then going in Monday morning for them to install a "pump" that I'll carry with me all week and will give me measured doses of another chemo drug throughout the week. From there I'll go in for a radiation treatment, go back for an I.V. dosage of a 3rd chemo drug that will take a few hours, and then it's back for another radiation treatment. The rest of the week -- Tuesday thru Friday -- I'll go for a morning and afternoon radiation treatment each day then, Saturday morning, I'll go down for them to remove the pump. I take the second week of each cycle off to complete the two weeks then start it all over again the following Sunday.

Five of those mean my last week of treatment will be the week of December 1st. Yes, I already have that marked on my calendar.

This morning my Ortho Doc juggled his schedule to work around my appointments at KU and met with me at 6:45. Really appreciated that. Plus, he gave me my arm back so I'm even more happy about that. Up until this morning I've had strict instructions to do NOTHING with that arm other than keep it in the sling or let it hang by my side. P.T. did some stretching with it but nothing I did my self. So now I get to start working back in to using the arm again. Probably take another month or two before it's much use to me, but we're making progress.

I then went to KU for a swallow study. Pretty cool, actually. Basically a video-X-Ray where they watch and record my swallowing different things. Some liquid, some thick liquid, a graham cracker and a pill. I got to watch out of the corner of my eye and it was pretty neat. I got a passing grade on my swallowing technique and abilities. Quite an athelete, eh?

Also spent some time with the folks that will be handling installation of my PEG Tube and Port tomorrow. Had to go over all the what to do and not do in the hours leading up to my appointment. The best part is that I can't eat after 6:00 am and won't get to each again until mid-morning on Friday. Say what! I've been doing everything I can to gain the 10 lbs I was instructed to gain and have conditioned my body for non-stop food intake. Now I not only lose 24-hours opportunity for weight gain but also have to tell my body "no food" for 24+ hours?

The weight gaining thing isn't going that well in the first place. I've been trying to do my job but, as of Tuesday morning, had only managed to gain one pound. Jenny and I did go to Lidia's last night with Ron and Alice. I had the all-you-can-eat Pasta Trio and, I thought, performed admirably. But all momentum will be lost on Thursday.